My 15 year old daughter walked in to my room last night and said, "Mom, I think I've changed. I realize that I like you and I don't mind being around you anymore."
okaaaay.... "That's great," I responded. "What caused this change?"
"Well, I think I didn't like you while I was in middle school because I was immature and trying to be cool. But now that I am going in to high school, I'm much more mature. But mom, I have bad news for you."
"This all sounds pretty good to me. What could be bad?" I asked.
"Well, you have 3 more years of 'bad' coming your way."
"How do you figure that?"
"Because Sam (little brother) is going in to middle school and you know he is gonna be a terd."
I hear a loud screech from inside the house. I hear him saying something about "it's not fair," and I try to tune him out. I realize my son is having a hormone induced melt down in the back of the house.
"Yeah, he is definitely going to be a terd," I said.
It's going to be a long 3 years...
Friday, June 29, 2012
Thursday, June 28, 2012
The Middle Aged Woman...
When she has hot flashes she doesn’t sweat…she glistens.
She can stop her teenagers in their tracks with just one look.
Her bra size is astronomical due to Menopausal Boob Syndrome.
Her obsession with hot guys without shirts is excessive…but necessary.
If anyone messes with her kids she will take them down in an instant…while wearing heels.
Her car is strewn with to-go cups and stray pieces of homework.
She hides chocolate for emergencies…don’t even think of touching it.
The “worry” lines in her forehead are there for a reason…botox be damned.
She has learned that, indeed, her mother was right.
She can diagnose the causes of a mal-performing car just as well as she can diagnose her kids’ illnesses.
Her multi-tasking talents are off the chain.
She can’t believe she can still get pimples.
Sexy to her is watching a man fold the laundry, cleaning the house, or washing the dishes.
Who is she?
She is The Most Interesting Person in the World – The Middle Aged Woman.
She can stop her teenagers in their tracks with just one look.
Her bra size is astronomical due to Menopausal Boob Syndrome.
Her obsession with hot guys without shirts is excessive…but necessary.
If anyone messes with her kids she will take them down in an instant…while wearing heels.
Her car is strewn with to-go cups and stray pieces of homework.
She hides chocolate for emergencies…don’t even think of touching it.
The “worry” lines in her forehead are there for a reason…botox be damned.
She has learned that, indeed, her mother was right.
She can diagnose the causes of a mal-performing car just as well as she can diagnose her kids’ illnesses.
Her multi-tasking talents are off the chain.
She can’t believe she can still get pimples.
Sexy to her is watching a man fold the laundry, cleaning the house, or washing the dishes.
Who is she?
She is The Most Interesting Person in the World – The Middle Aged Woman.
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